I WANT TO DIE

"God, enough is enough!" Have you ever felt that way? When life hits hard some of us feel like giving up on living. Whether due to physical pain, disease, emotional struggles, or relational problems, it is easy to become frustrated with life and wish for something different. Sometimes when I tell my friends the experiences of my life, I tell them I was so depressed that I wanted to die and they say that they have also had that thought when faced with extremely painful situations. How do we deal with “what to die” situations?

We read some cases of Prophets in the Bible who also have had a desire to die.

1. JONAH

In Jonah 4:10-11, we read how Jonah sat outside the city to await God's judgement upon the people of Nineveh. When it did not happen, Jonah was upset and wanted to die. Not the best example to follow.

Jonah was so self centred on his situation that he did not think about the whole town returning to God. Sometimes when we are self-centred and not God-centred we might miss our focus. Nevertheless God was not angry with Him, in fact God spoke to Him.

Takeaway point: God can speak to you even when you are depressed!

2. JOB

Job was one person who went through the toughest time in his life. Although he was a good man, he had a terrible disease, his children were dead, his wife told him to curse God and his friends blamed him. In such time Job says, “What strength do I have, that I should still hope? I have nothing to live for. I don’t have strength to prolong my life.”(Job 6:11). In other words Job wanted to die.

Then Job said, “Though God slays me, I will trust Him. Blessed be His name. God, I am broken inside this doesn’t make any sense, I don’t have any other hope, but I am going to hope in you”. In the end of the story we see that God restored double of everything in Job’s life.

Takeaway point: Trust God when your current situation makes no sense!

3. ELIJAH

We read of how Elijah had done a big miracle and Jezebel wanted to kill him and he was running in the wilderness. He sat down and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.”( 1 Kings 19:4)

God then sent an angel to provide him some cakes and water twice. Elijah was then strengthened by that food, and he continued his journey to the mountain of God.

Takeaway point: Even in the wilderness, God wants to strengthen you!

4.  MOSES

 When Moses was leading the people of Israel from Egypt to the promise land, the people started grumbling and complaining against Moses. Every family then started wailing at the entrance of their tents. Moses was troubled and told God, “If you are going to treat me like this, please kill me right now if I have found favour with you, and don't let me see my misery anymore.” (Numbers 11:15)

Later we read that Moses prayed, worshipped and kept going. Of course, God did many miracles and heard Moses’ plea on behalf of the people.

Takeaway point: When life hits hard, get up, dust off, worship God and keep going!

If you are in a dark phase of your life, I urge that you cry out to God saying, “God, this doesn’t make sense, I am hurt, I am broken, I don’t have another hope so I’m gonna hold on to you, I’m gonna trust you. Even though my heart is breaking, I believe your word for my current circumstance. I’m not moving from what You told You will do in my life. I’m holding on to Your promises. I know you are in control. I belong to you. Let Your will be done!". When you pray such prayers, God will give you peace in the midst of the storm.

I hope this blog encourages you. And if at all we have ever prayed, God let me die and He did hear our prayer, no one would be alive on earth!  Sometimes it’s better God doesn’t answer our silly prayers! :)

Pray when everything else fails